PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
