Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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