last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
She told me I should be a condom model.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Randomize
