I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
