I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
