I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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