HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Randomize
