Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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