I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
