Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
