wakey wakey hands off snakey
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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