You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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