But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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