So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
