You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
