the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
no. you can't hotbox the world.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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