life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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