Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
