thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
