Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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