I just saw a hot homeless man
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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