I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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