Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
