so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
you win again, gameday.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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