she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
