I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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