ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
