ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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