Whoa Z and x make the same sound
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
