absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
