just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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