But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize