Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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