If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize