guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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