Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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