I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
We left the knife in your bed.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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