note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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