Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
