Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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