I wanna passion pit in your ass
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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