But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
