i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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