So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Randomize
