JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
