Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize