belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
