bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
