I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
