We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize
