matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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